Few of us get through life without feeling betrayed by someone, while some are handed the lion’s share. Heartache is painful. That’s why it’s called heartache. It can last for months or years and keep us shut down and wounded, making it nearly impossible to recover. It can wrap us in fear and make it impossible to have another relationship. It can even turn us into someone bitter.
And heartbreak can lead to a dry spell, it may knock you on your butt and take away your ability to trust someone new, here are some things you can do to learn to trust again.
Well, I know in the beginning that dating again after a long relationship can be very scary for multiple reasons. You may feel you cannot trust anyone because trust was a major factor in your last relationship. The sheer definition of truth is a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something. I have good news. There is no one more important to trust than yourself and I see it with my clients.
Here are my top 3 tips to help you learn to regain your sense of trust:
1 Acknowledge your Feelings - It's important to acknowledge your feelings and avoid being a victim. Victims tend to see themselves as helpless and not in charge of their lives. You are not a victim! The first step in healing is acknowledging the pain. I want you to acknowledge what happened and how much it hurt i.e. "I hate that Joe cheated on me, it made me feel so unloved. I don't ever want to feel that way again."
2 Learn from the Past - What have you learned from your past relationships? Now, I know some of you are saying. "Well, that's easy, I've learned to stop dating jerks!" While that may be true, I want you to keep the focus on YOU and start thinking about where are your opportunities for growth?
- Here are a few questions you may want to ask yourself:
- Do I need to learn how to set boundaries?
- Do I still need to learn how to ask for what I want?
- Do I still need to learn how to say no?
Please keep in mind this does not excuse any abhorrent behavior or mistakes that your partner has made. You can't change him or what he's done. Instead, you must take responsibility for YOUR actions and begin to look at each date and each relationship as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and to grow!
3 Go Out & Look for the Good - You're never going to learn how to trust if you're sitting at home complaining. Instead, you need to get out and experience what it feels like to be around different men. You also need to learn how to feel safe around men.
When you come home from a date do you call your girlfriends and complain for hours about everything that was wrong with each guy? Unfortunately, this only leaves you feeling more frustrated and discouraged. Instead, you need to shift your mindset and start focusing on your date's positive attributes. Begin to believe that just like you, your date has good intentions and if he turns out to be a jerk, YOU can choose to walk away.
The Truth about Choices
Choices, we all have them. They are designed to make sure we don't repeat painful pasts if you will. Think about it. Have you ever been in a relationship where a man betrayed you in some way? Do you push men away because you are afraid to trust again? If so, be sure to watch this video to learn how to start your journey to trusting men again and finding the love you deserve.
Remember, love yourself and respect yourself first!
If you're ready to take action NOW and learn how to start trusting men so that you can finally start to attract the man of your dreams, click the link below: